20. Someone who abandons you in one of the most dangerous cities in Latin America.
19. Someone who gags at the sight of a cow eye and is not willing to take a nibble of said country’s delicacy.
18. Someone who faints in an outdoor open air market because ‘it smells like fish.’
17. Someone who doesn’t know when to pretend to NOT BE from the United States.
16. Someone who isn’t proud to be an American where at least you know you’re free. And proudly stand up! Next to you! And defend your rights today to others who judge you by your country before actually taking the time to know you as an individual…yadda yadda yadda.
15. Someone who doesn’t like to strike up conversation with shirtless Italian surfers.
14. Someone who has too much confidence when riding a bike downhill, removes her hands from the handlebars, abides by the cliche moment and screams “I’m the King of the World”. Then mere moments later, realizes she is going at a neck breaking speed, reacts too quickly, breaks fast, and flies over the handlebars, and somehow, miraculously doesn’t break an arm or chip any teeth. This doesn’t necessary make, ehem, anonymous girl a bad traveler. What makes her a bad traveler is that she drank an entire bottle of wine before getting on the bike. I assure you this wasn’t me. Promise. Really.
13. Someone who only discusses obscure bands he/she listens to and can’t relate to the Slovenian who loves Queen. Because everyone EFFING LOVES Queen!
12. Someone who doesn’t realize the most interesting quality a traveler can possess is showing interest in other people.
11. Someone who blushes when teaching valuable English words such as ‘shart’ to non-native English speakers.
10. Someone not willing to learn valuable vocabulary words in other languages such as ‘palomino’ in Spanish. (You’ll have to do a little research on this one).
9. Someone who prefers to ‘sleep in’ instead of ‘pass out’ on a beach.
8. Someone who ‘checks bags.’
7. Someone who is too afraid to run with the bulls, not so to speak. (I am a little terrified to do that). So, rephrase, someone who is too afraid to participate in La Tomatina aka the tomato battle.
6. Someone who thinks Iguazu Falls is ‘just ok.’
5. Someone who never buys chicle from children.
4. Someone who isn’t willing to pose in front of a fountain, making it appear as if the water is shooting out of their rear.
3. Someone who doesn’t like to groove to their taxi driver’s music.
2. Someone who isn’t your sister.
1. Someone not willing to board the plane, the bus, the ferry, the metro, the blah blah car, the canoe, the dinghy, the teleférico, the hang glider, the hippie wagon, or put on their best walking shoes to discover a new land, a new people, and an entirely new way of perceiving the world.
